Guest Blog Week Day 3....

Another day, another guest blog. This one comes from someone despite his young age is profound beyond his years. Definitely going places in life, so keep an eye out for him. He, like everyone else, is going to describe what its like to be to caught up in the nonsensical vortex that is my life. So without further delay, I give you guest blog number 3.

"Wow, I’m finally in it. This is J-Smalls aka Jordan of my infamous blog, thebrainofjordan.blogspot.com (shameless self-promotion) and I must say, when Bobby let me guest blog, I was honored because this man has been helping raise me since I was a fat kid wearing navy blue uniform shorts in kindergarten. I have to attest to the completeness of Bobby because he does do it all. For instance, when I first met him, I thought he was the funniest guy in the world. He could tell a good story while drawing some fancy artistic creation. He made me want to get into art even though I suck at it. I can honestly say that he is one of the few people I listen to because he’s one of the few people who is right. And while I know I’m an original and I try to set the path, I unapologetically copy Bobby. When he was drawing a lot, I wanted to draw. When he played video games with the dexterity of a true nerd while simultaneously crossin’ people up in basketball, I had to try it. (I later learned that football was my thing).
While we’re on that, him taking the time to play football with my friends and I after school helped me develop the skills I have now. I wouldn’t be able to play football in college if it wasn’t for him throwing the ball super hard at my chest until I learned how to catch and teaching me how to sidestep an aggressive defender. It’s a weird relationship because while he’s my role model who I respect and look up to, at the same time, he’s also one of my peers who I can bounce ideas off of and not have to put up a façade around. Speaking of that, why do people even as adults put up fake images of who they are as soon as they get around older people? You would think that by now with the advent of technology that no matter what you try to come off as, we will just Google you and expose you, typically as a weak individual who still tries to cultivate romantic relationships on Facebook. Come on son.
Back to the lecture at hand, most people don’t realize that Bobby should have a job as an image consultant. No matter how successful I get or how many cool things I do, Bobby is right there to humble me. True story, in high school, I became a starter and one of the team captains and I told Bobby how I was going to be so cool and how I was that guy, to which he bluntly replied, “That’s nice, you’re still probably not going to get the ball that much.” Ah, the candor of a true friend. Now in my first year of college, he’s keeping me from getting too crazy and keeping me true to my roots. When I get rich and famous, I’m going to pay him to do these things so I don’t end up in tabloids.
I must also thank Bobby for being one of the few people left who still has reason in a world full of idiots. Case in point, I don’t get why people wear Ed Hardy still. Like Bobby said, It’s a Bedazzled t-shirt (as I type this, Microsoft Word did not correct the word Bedazzled, thus making it a real word Imagineer that). And the people who wear Ed Hardy are the biggest examples of an oxymoron in the world. Wearers of Ed Hardy are typically huge guys who spend copious amounts of time at your local Gold’s Gym or Bally’s and talk about how muscular they are, but at the same time spend an hour doing their hair and worry about things like exfoliating (see Jersey Shore for a better view of the Ed Hardy epidemic). I just don’t get it. Well, I said too much. I’m out of here. Copywritten, so, don’t copy me."

Umm... word? I think that's what is appropriate to say right there? Anyways, shout outs to J-Smalls my future boss. Hey boss, is there any way I can take my sick days right now? And you know I'm already asking for a raise....

Come back tomorrow for another guest blog!