Happy Saturday!!! Or at least that's what I would be saying if it were not for this exact date. But before you go googling what happened, just read and I will tell you. So listen up, and save all questions for the end. And get out your puffy orange vests and gas up the Delorean, for in order for me to properly tell this story, I have to go back in time.
The year was 1984, and things were going great. There was no global warming, No war in Afghanistan, and common birds chirped songs that would rival the best works of composers like Beethoven and Mozart. On this day a young boy named Bobby walked into a hospital and saw an alien. Everyone was excited, but Bobby was horrified. For at once, and with no reason the evil alien opened its eyes, and wailed. Everyone thought the alien was crying, But to Young Bobby, the wail translated to, "I'm going to ruin everything. I will destroy your world, and all you can do is watch"
So for the next 25 years our intrepid hero tried unsuccessfully to rid the world of this evil. But the alien was smart, it adapted, and took control over once sensible human beings to aid it in its cause to make the world a terrible place to be. It is because of this alien's efforts that this world has not achieved greatness. Things like world peace, cures for cancer, and flying cars are absent, all because of this alien's successful operation to send us to our demise.
So congratulations Kim... As you celebrate another year on our earth, we are reminded of how awesome our lives could have been. And I know you guys are thinking, "That there is no way your sister is responsible for us not having flying cars." Maybe not, but she is responsible for being my bratty little sister. But I still love her anyways... Happy Birthday Showbiz!!!!
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