Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy and sportsmanship... know what they have in common? They don't exist. Each one, a mythical fairy tale designed to make kids feel good. I know I'm sounding like a crazy person, but bear with me. I have a plan. We just may have to take some ikea-like "shortcuts" to get there.
As many of you know I have coached/played basketball for many years. And one thing I've always hated is once the game is over, you gotta huddle up and say "good game whoever" and line up to go and shake the other teams hand and say "good game". Its cool if the game was actually a good one, but what if you get beat by 30? There is nothing worse than having to shake someones hand when you REALLY don't want to. And the winning team says good game, but what they all are thinking is, "Yo... you should have just forfeited and saved us all two hours."
And don't even get me started on adult life. I have seen very few instances where the guy who exhibits all those traits he learned playing little league actually get ahead. Usually its the guy who is willing to sell his moms kidneys that wins. I've seen now more than ever, you have to be willing to do what the other guy won't.
You're like, "Bobby that's so awful! What will you tell your children?" To cheat, but do it respectfully. It won't be full on cheating, just the exploitation of loopholes within the rules of the game. I will tell them that I only know of one guy who could Doright and win... and his name was Dudley. (Give it a few minutes.... and there you go.) I've taught other peoples kids to cheat, just as I have taught them to ambush and terrorize. So don't be surprised if in about ten years, a little Williams kid is hand checking in rec league, with me as proud as a peacock. You have been warned.
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